Speak Masterfully with Joel Weldon

In This Episode

• [02:21] – Stephan and Joel talk about common public speaking mistakes, with Joel stressing the importance of simplifying complex topics into easy-to-follow steps.
• [12:03] – Joel recounts a story about giving a presentation to an IBM engineering group, encouraging listeners to envision themselves as invisible guests in Miami Beach.
• [15:00] – Joel evaluates feedback cards after meetings to enhance future presentations.
• [20:45] – Joel narrates a personal story of transformation after meeting a man who influenced his eating habits.
• [23:19] – Joel converses with a friend about healthy eating habits, such as avoiding sugar and soft drinks and setting a 30-day goal to improve their diet.
• [38:58] – Stephan highlights the importance of focusing on personal progress rather than comparing oneself to others.
• [50:55] – Stephan and Joel explore the power of mindset and perspective in business and life.
• [55:14] – Instructions on how to connect with Joel.

Jump to Links and Resources

Joel, it’s so great to have you on the show.

Well, it’s a pleasure, Stephan, to be here.

Yeah. We know each other through the Genius Network, and I think very highly of you. I’m excited to have you on. You’ve been on my list of folks I wanted to have on my podcast, so thank you for being here.

Well, let’s get started because your listeners are busy entrepreneurs wanting to know how they can market and sell even better. And they’re here because they want to get some good ideas. And you know that one of the keys to marketing and selling is your ability to communicate. So, what’s your first question? Wonderful host.

Yeah. So I would love to know, and I bet our listener would love to know, what are some of the biggest mistakes you have seen in the countless number of speeches you’ve attended and given? What are some of the most common and some of the worst mistakes that speakers make?

Well, that’s a great question. As you’re listening, you’re here because you want to get some practical ideas, things you could use right away. And the question that Stephan asks is, what are the mistakes people make when making presentations? And you’ve been in audiences for years, and how many times have you heard a speaker talk and you turn to the person next to you, whether you know them or not, and say, “what are they talking about? Where is this going?” 

One of the keys to marketing and selling is your ability to communicate.

So, one of the biggest mistakes I think people make is they open with a story. They start a story right away. There I was in Yosemite, and a fire had been there before me, and I was thinking, “Who cares? What does Yosemite have to do with you increasing your marketing ability and your sales ability?” One of the mistakes people make is telling a story without opening it with the point of the story. So that’s your first suggestion. If you’re going to share a story, whether it’s about yourself, about a client, or any idea, set it up first so your audience knows where it’s going. 

So right now, if we were talking, this being the beginning of the message for you, the point of this next story is to help you be an even better speaker.One of the ways you can do that is by identifying the mistakes ordinary speakers make. Now, that tells you the point of what will come next. So that’s suggestion number one: in a mistake, you should avoid it, open with a point and then tell the story, example, or metaphor. 

Mistake number two that ordinary speakers make is they think speaking is a performance act. Once they step up on stage or get in front of a camera, they are performing. In my experience, speaking effectively is not a performance act. It’s a connecting act. It’s your ability to connect what you know or feel with the people you’re trying to reach or connect with, and you do that by being yourself.

If you’re the kind of person that if somebody asked your friends, “Hey, what is so and so like really?” the answer should be, “What you see is what you get,” which means you’re congruent, that you’re the same. I think that’s one thing that Stephan and I have going for each other in our relationship since we’ve known each other for many years through the Genius Network. 

Speaking effectively is not a performance act. It’s a connecting act.

Stephan is always the same, and I’m always the same. We’re not putting on an act when we meet and talk about his son David, his business, or any of those other things; it’s all the same. So whenever you make a presentation, just be yourself. Just be you because that’s how you have learned to be successful, connecting. 

It’s not how you use your voice or your body or how to make gestures. That’s acting. And think of what an actor does. Great actors, such as Tom Hanks and Meryl Streep, are great actors and actresses, and they have the ability to pretend they’re somebody. They’re nothing. Is that what you want in a successful marketer or sales professional, that they have the ability to be somebody they’re not? That’s not what clients are looking for. They want congruency. They want connection. They want to know who you are. And you do that by just being you.

So, mistake number one is not opening with a point. Mistake number two would be thinking that you’ve got to perform when you don’t have to. You can just be you. And by the way, if you happen to be dull, boring and monotone, then speak dull, boring, and monotone. But we just bring it up in the introduction ahead of time. 

So let’s say that’s what I was: dull, boring, and monotone in the introduction. You heard it would have said something like this. By the way, Joel isn’t the speaker. This is out of his comfort zone. As a matter of fact, he’s a very dull, boring guy. He’s probably the most boring person I know. If you were to look up the word boring in a dictionary, you would see a picture of Joel Weldon. 

Now, the fact that he’s boring put that aside because when it comes to making effective presentations, Joel knows more about that than anybody I’ve ever met. So please welcome my speaker training friend, Joel Weldon, the most boring guy you will ever meet. Now, if this presentation was dull, boring, and monotone, and you heard that upfront, you know what your mind would be saying? Well, he’s not that boring. He’s not that monotone.

So you can anticipate anything by setting it up in front. This is not something that they normally do. If that’s your case, put that in your introduction that I’ve asked them to come because they’re an expert on widgets, but speaking in front of a group is not their thing. But I’ve asked him to do this because nobody knows more about widgets than your guest. So that’s the next idea. I’ll give you one other little tidbit, and then we’ll go to the next question. So, if you’re going to open with the point, if you’re going to be yourself, make sure that it’s clear right in the beginning what will happen in your message.

I call that opening with your end. What is the end of this message? It’s going to be; you’ll have so many good ideas on how to make even better presentations. I have a system, and we’re going to give you my website. If what you hear makes sense, go check it out. That’s it. I’m not going to send you a QR code to buy something at this point, but if this makes sense and you want to know more, just look at my website and see what’s available. So that’s the result of this interview.

What if you made those three mistakes that ordinary speakers make, and they don’t make the point? They start acting and performing, and they don’t tell the audience in the beginning what the end game is. John Maxwell always said to start with the end in mind. Well, make sure your audience knows where it’s going. Does that make sense, Stephan?

Make sure that what happens in your message is clear right at the beginning.

Oh, that’s great. I also want to applaud you, for I think you probably do it in your muscle memory these days. You’ve been doing it for so long. You recap the question, and then you recap each of the major points after you’ve finished it so that everyone has that mile marker of knowing. Oh, that was mistake number one. Now we’re on mistake number two. Oh, we just finished mistake number two. And I guess I forgot mistake number one by now.

So you’ve recapped mistake number one, which is this. Mistake number two is that. And now, let’s go into mistake number three. I think that’s really helpful, and not a lot of speakers do that.

Well, that’s certainly another tip that you picked up on. But remember, the biggest challenge you have as you’re listening, if you’re doing a video, being interviewed, being on a podcast, or doing a webinar, is you know too much. You know everything about your subject; you live and breathe it. Like SEO with you, Stephan. I mean, you’ve written the Bible, the biggest book I’ve ever seen. You’ve written on these subjects. You know it; you breathe it. But you’re talking to people who don’t know what you know.

So, not that you dumb it down, but you make it so easy to follow what you’re talking about. So there were three mistakes you heard. So number them, put them in order, and repeat them because they hear it for the first time. The little expression makes it impossible for your message to be misunderstood. 

Impossible to be misunderstood. 

Well, thank you for picking that up.

I also want to circle back on something you said about the personal story and setting it up first because if you have an incredible story of struggle or of overcoming adversity, that will inspire people, and they’ll get a lesson from that. It doesn’t mean withholding it; it just means providing some context so that when they’re gonna listen to it, they’re gonna be more receptive to it. They’ll be listening to the point because you gave them the point. And I think one story will be really instructive and fascinating for our listeners. One of your personal stories is how you gave up sugar and have not had a soda or a dessert in how many years now?

'This, too, is for the good.' Finding the positive in any situation can transform the way we navigate challenges and lead to unexpected success. Share on X

March 16, 1981.

That’s mind-blowing. And congratulations on that success. Now, there’s a story behind that. So, if you could share that story, but first, set it up with the point so that our listener knows that there is some gold to be extracted for themselves from your own story.

Okay. All right, this is a great question for you as you listen. How do you tell a personal story but make it about your audience? Because, frankly, you don’t really care about my story. Now, maybe you’re intrigued by what Stephan said. Here’s this old guy talking to me, and he hasn’t had the candy, cookie, ice cream, or any kind of sweet and drank anything but water since March 16, 1981. What happened? Well, it is a great story, and of course, it’s a true story, but I’m going to tell this story like you should tell a story. I’m going to put you in the story, and this is going to be a conversation between you and me as you’re listening. So, just imagine you’re my invisible guest in Miami Beach, Florida, at the Fontainebleau Hotel.

The audience that you and I are going to be in front of is an IBM engineering group, the field engineering division of IBM. In the 1980s, IBM was one of the best companies in the world to work for, and it was a premier company. 

I have been going to the same group for the last five years. They kept having me back because the message was so valuable to them, but it was a different message every year. So just imagine you’ve heard me give this talk. Then you and I go back to my hotel room. We have to get quickly packed, head to the airport, and head back from Miami to Scottsdale, Arizona, and you’re going to help me carry my bag. But then I say, I’m going to go into the bathtub and sit for a while.

So I close the door, I go in the bathtub, and you’re sitting out there reading a book. And I’m sitting in this hot bathtub, trying to get my energy back, eating a giant semi-sweet chocolate bar, which I always had, trying to get my energy back from being worn out from this presentation. Then I quickly come out, get dressed, and you and I head to the airport. We check in on American Airlines. Sitting in first class, I’m in seat 1A, which is the window seat. You’re my invisible partner on this trip, so you can sit on my lap. Nobody’s going to see you. And we get ready to head back to Dallas, where we’re going to switch planes and then head to Phoenix on the next leg.

When you get on an airplane, do you talk to the people next to you, or do you try to do some work? What’s your normal habit? Would you say hello to the man or woman next to you, or would you be quiet? So, Stephan, what would you do? Do you talk, or do you just stay quiet?

If you’re an entrepreneur, you don’t get a salary. You’re getting the rewards based on your efforts.

I actually listen to my intuition on what to do. I would identify more as an introvert than an extrovert. So, I prefer to keep to myself and work. But if I’m being nudged to talk to the person, which I have been, then I will, and something amazing will happen, usually.

Okay, well, my habit is I have work to do. So I’ve finished this meeting. They filled out a critique card, and on the plane, the first thing I did was look at these feedback cards on what they got out of the program, what they liked best, and what could have been improved. And that’s the single most powerful thing that you can do if you make presentations and get feedback from your audience. Now, talk a dot. And so many other online programs let you do it on a virtual call. We do virtual training every month with some of our groups, and we always have feedback from Cardinal. In live meetings, we’d have a little green feedback card on Joel, and it would ask six simple questions.

That’s how I got paid. Anything on a one to ten scale under a seven I didn’t charge for. That was my guarantee for almost 50 years as a professional Hall of Fame speaker. I wanted to be under the gun every time I spoke. How about you? Do you like to be responsible for what you do, or do you want to get a salary? If you’re an entrepreneur, you don’t get a salary. You’re getting the rewards based on your efforts. So that was my plan on the plane, Stephan, was to review my evaluation cards, which I was. So I don’t talk to anybody.

And then the flight attendant comes over. We’re up at altitude, and she says we’re ready for dinner. Now, this is in 1981. Things were different in 1981 on American Airlines in first class; it was truly a first-class experience. And as you’re listening, if you’re too young to remember what it was like flying in 1981, people actually dressed up to go on an airplane. They didn’t go out in shorts and a T-shirt and no shoes like you see today, or they got thongs on.

So the flight attendant says, “You need to remove those cards because we’ve got to get the food out.” A few minutes later, she came with this beautiful tray of a big steak, my big glass of Pepsi, and a chocolate layer cake. She put it down with real silverware, linen napkins, and a tablecloth.

Then, something happens that’s different. So you’re my invisible partner. As you’re listening, in 1981, they had smoking on airplanes. So where the bulkhead, rows one and two, is “no smoking.” The seats are behind us, but row three is the smoking row. There were three rows of first-class on those jets in American Airlines in 1981. For some reason, on that day, the circulation system wasn’t working, and the smoke was hitting Stephan’s bulkhead. And kind of rolling right into our face.

It might as well have been like we were supposed to. Would you be happy with an experience like that?

No, not at all.

Not at all. So I said, and I’m sure as you’re listening, you’ve said this. When you’re with somebody you don’t know, you haven’t made any contact with them at all, and you say something sort of in their direction but not directly at them. And I commented as the food was put in front of me. “Oh, man, this smoke is really bad.” And the man next to me says, in this exact tone and volume, “Not as bad as that crap you’re about to eat.” Now, those are the first words between us. What would you have done? As you’re listening to that, a complete stranger looking at this beautiful first-class meal says, you’re eating crap? I was so taken aback that I said, “But what do you mean?” He said, “Do you really want to know?” in that tone of voice. 

Well, are you hooked? Would you have wanted to know why this guy is saying that?

Yeah.

Because he refused the meal, there was nothing on his tray. I said, “Yeah.” He said, “Do you like rolls?” I said, “Yeah, I love rolls.” So he reaches over, grabs the roll, and picks it up, and I can still see him. He holds it in front of me and squeezes it. He said, “This is made with white flour. Rats don’t even eat white flour. It’s crap.” He threw it on the floor. 

He said, “You put butter on your roll; you’re not eating that roll now. Do you put butter on the roll?” I said, “Yeah.” He said, “There’s no butter.” And he said, “This is chemicals. It’s chemicals. It’s crap.”

Threw the butter on the floor. He said, “Do you eat your salad?” I said, “Well, there’s nothing wrong with salad.” “No, the salad’s good, but what will you put on? Are you going to put that dressing on there? It’s crap. It’s chemicals. There’s no salad dressing in. This is chemicals.” Threw it on the floor. And then he says this.

Now, as you’re listening, if this happened to you, would you just be totally bewildered? What? This guy’s throwing your food on the floor. He’s kind of yelling at you, and you don’t even know who he is. And then he says to me, “What’s your name?” I said, “Joel Weldon.” And he said, “My name is Alvin Cassuto”. And he reached over and shook my hand, and he said, “I used to be like you. I used to eat crap until somebody told me what I was doing. And that’s what I’m doing. You’re eating crap. And do you drink that Pepsi?” I said, “Oh, yeah, I love Pepsi.” He said, “you might as well just drink a bowl of sugar that’s filled with sugar. That’s the worst thing you got there.”

Yeah. In fact, you could do a fun experiment. Have a kid like our grandkid, who just lost a tooth. I was going to put it under the pillow. Do the experiment instead, where you drop it into Pepsi or Coke and leave it overnight. It’s gone the next morning. 

No.

It’s gone.

A tooth. A baby tooth would disappear from. 

Yeah, 

Involve your audience.

Well, that’s all I did. I never even heard that. That’s. How could people drink that stuff? But that’s all I drank all day long. And I ate sweets. Oh, man, I just love sweets. Especially that semi-sweet chocolate. I also had cookies and candy in my bag in case I ran out of other things to snack on. So let’s stop right now. Now, do you know the point of the story?

Yeah.

How an experience can change your life because you hear the result that you haven’t eaten anything sweet or had anything to drink other than water since March 16, 1981, which was the date of this flight. And meeting Alvin Cassuto literally changed my life. Also, did you notice who came along with me while telling the story? You’re my invisible partner. Involve your audience. 

Now I’m going to ask you, like I did Stephan, you as the listener, what would you have said? What would you have been thinking if you had added that to your stories? If that was you, how would you have responded? What would have been going through your mind if you had heard something like that? Is a complete stranger throwing food on the floor right in front of you? Well, you’d be curious. So he asked me my name. We introduced each other, and he said, “I don’t know what you do,” but he said, “I could tell you’re eating crap because you look tired. Are you tired?” I said, “Yeah, I am tired.”

He said, “What do you do?” I said, “Well, I’m a professional speaker.” “Oh.” He said, “Did you speak today?” I said, “Yeah. How long did you speak?” I said, “Well, I spoke for 2 hours for a group at IBM at the Fountain Blue Hotel.” And then he looks at me with this perplexed look and says, “You spoke for 2 hours? You talked for 2 hours, and you’re tired. How could you get tired of talking for 2 hours? I talk all day long. I don’t get tired. But I used to get tired when I eat crap like you’re eating.”

And he said, “It’s all your mother’s fault.” Now he’s bringing up my mother. He said, “My mother, what does she have to do with this?” Because she wanted you to be a big, strong boy, so she fed you steaks. He said, “Joel, what’s the biggest, strongest animal you could think of?” Stephan, what’s the biggest, strongest animal you can think of?

Humpback whale.

Okay, what’s a one on land?

I don’t know. A bison.

Okay. Do you ever see the meat in a steak?

I sure haven’t, no.

Everything happens for a reason. We meet the people and the situations that we need at the moment.

Well, most people say an elephant. Elephant eats grass. The biggest, strongest animal on earth eats grass. He said, “You don’t need to eat meat to get protein.” He said, “Now I got my food under the bag.” Now remember, I’m in 1A, he’s in 1B. And he said, “Under this seat, I’ve got salad, fruit and vegetables, a piece of fish, and that’s what I’m going to eat for dinner. I’m not eating crap like you’re doing.”

And I’m drinking only water, and that’s all I drink. He said, “What about that piece of chocolate layer cake?” I said,” Oh man, I love chocolate.” He said, “You might as well just eat poison.” It’s filled with sugar. Sugar is the killer.” Now, I would add that somebody told me if you put a baby’s tooth in a jar of Pepsi or Coke, it’ll be gone in the morning. It just dissolves it. And that’s why I had such terrible teeth growing up because I was just eating sugar all the time, and I was tired after 2 hours.

So, as a result of that conversation, he then turned to after the meal, I couldn’t eat anything. And I ate the salad and the vegetables and a little bit, and he said,” You can have a little bit of red meat, but you don’t want to eat a big steak like that. Chicken and fish are what you should be eating mostly. A little bit of lean meat is okay, but don’t overdo it, and don’t eat sugar or sweets. Drink only water.” And he said, “You see these green cards. What is that all about?” I said, “Well, this audience rates it, and then they write the best ideas. What was the best idea?” He said, “Because I see these goals that say I’m looking,” because he’s looking at the cards. I said, “Yeah, 30-day goals was the suggestion they felt was the best idea of the whole seminar.”

He said,” All right, why don’t you do that? Why don’t you set a 30-day goal? Stop eating crap, eat chicken and fish, fruit and vegetables, drink only water and no sweets and see how you feel.  Here’s my business card. And then send me a note or call me and tell me what happened.” 

Well, you already know the end of the story. When I got home, I told my wife, Judy, what had happened; she had just finished reading Sugar Blues. Sugar Blues in the late seventies and early eighties was one of the top books. First time ever, Stephan. People were talking about the negative effects that sugar has, especially in soft drinks.

She was a big fan of that and said, “I think Alvin’s right. Why don’t you try it” now as you’re listening? You have heard of people that have addictions, whether it’s smoking in the past. Now, very few people are smoking alcohol or drugs or working. You know, when you have an addiction, it’s out of your control. And that’s what I had with sweets. The minute I got home from the airport, I’d stop at Baskins-Robbins, get a double scoop of burgundy cherry ice cream, and eat it on the way home. Automatic. However, based on that experience, not once since 1981 have I even thought of, been tempted to or touched anything that we’ve been talking about that’s labeled as crap.

It was gone because two days after getting home, I turned to my wife, Judy, and said, “I just have so much more energy now.” That’s many, many, many years ago when you think about that. I still have more energy now than I had when I was 40. And I’m going to be 83 next year. I attribute it all to Alvin Cassuto. For the next ten years, on March 16 every year, I wrote him a thank you note and said, “Alvin, I’m in your program. I’m feeling wonderful. I’ve got more energy. Nobody can keep up with me. Thank you, thank you, thank you. I can still visualize the food on the floor and you yelling at me.”

And then I got a letter back the 10th year, undeliverable. And I don’t know what happened. Now, he was quite a bit older than me, but that story had such a significant impact on my personal life. But I’ve already had the benefit. Now, you have the benefit of how you tell a story. Open with the point, put your audience in the story, and make it about them because they don’t care about you.

And maybe, in this case, as Stephan says, this will help you see what you can do. And there’s one other part to this story that might be helpful for you as you think of sales and marketing, breaking old, unproductive habits. How is it possible that something as dramatic as that could have been so easy? And here’s a metaphor for change. So, Stephan, since you’re the only one that can answer these questions, just answer them. How much is two plus two?

Four.

Okay. Are you sure?

Yes.

You’ve got to get yourself out of the way. Focus on your audience's needs and deliver your message in a way that resonates with them. Share on X

Okay, you’re right. It is. Now, did you practice that before we did this podcast? Just in case I was going to ask you, do you know it?

I knew it.

You knew it. Okay. Now, you have a five-year-old son, David, right?

Still four, but he’ll be five soon.

Okay. Four. Four. Okay. He’s going to be fine. Does he know math yet?

A little bit, yeah.

Two plus two is four?

I think so, yeah.

Okay. Would he be as sure as you are that it’s four?

When you see it clearly, it’s unshakable faith, not discipline. That’s how you break habits.

I don’t know. Maybe not.

Probably not. But let’s go when he’s three, let’s say, take a three-year-old who’s smart like he is, or let’s think as you, as the listener. When you were three years old, maybe you heard from an older brother or sister, mom or dad, or maybe a kindergarten teacher. When you’re pre-kindergarten, about two plus two is four. But on one day, you say, well, two plus two is three, I think. Is it three? Let’s say it’s. No, no, it’s five. No, two plus two is four.

I don’t remember. Okay. Would you agree that at some point in your life, Stephan, you weren’t 100% sure that two plus two is four, but at some point in your early life, you got to the tipping point where you were not sure and became sure, absolutely, positively, for the rest of my life, through eternity, that two plus two will be four? Is that true?

Yeah.

Nothing will change that. When you see that clearly, it’s not discipline. It’s not constant daily reminding your brain and soul that two plus two is four. Unshakable faith. And that’s what can happen when breaking habits. That day in March of 1981, the second day, which was March 21, of that experience with Alvin, it became so clear to me that what I was eating was making me tired and not giving me the energy I needed for my food, and I was never going back. 

It wasn’t discipline. It wasn’t willpower. It was understanding the power of drinking water, eating fruit and vegetables, chicken and fish, and a little bit of red meat and exercising every day. All the other things that we know about effortless, just like it was effortless for you to know that two plus two is four. So what if you did that with sales and marketing? What if you understood so clearly from the guests that Stephan puts on this podcast, from the things he shares with you in the groups that follow him, that what he’s teaching you becomes you? It becomes clear. It then is an effortless transition. You don’t need to think about it. Stephan said he didn’t practice. Two plus two is four.

Before we got on this podcast, he knew it. He knows it now; he’ll know it tomorrow. And there’s no effort. And that’s what can happen with your habits and addictions. Once you see so clearly, it can be effortless. Now, is there a physiological change in my body, having fed it sugar for all of those years, 40 years, because I was 40 years old at that time, and now I’m going to be 83? So that’s 43 years ago. More than half my life has been spent without it.

Even the first half was spent with it. I need a whole box of See’s Candies at Christmas time rather than one at a time. I am a constant sugar addict. It is gone in two days. What do you want to have in two days of your life? Start studying about it. Get a clear picture. Once you see that two plus two is four, transitions can be effortless for you. So that’s the story of drinking and eating healthy, thanks to a stranger on an airplane.

I never saw him again; I just communicated by mail. But what an impact.

When moderation isn’t an option, abstinence is the only solution.

Yeah. That was a divine setup for you.

Yes, well, everything happens for a reason. We meet the people and the situations that we need at the moment. And that’s what I needed. I’m sure I wouldn’t be here today if I hadn’t met Alvin or if I had kept eating and drinking what I was doing. No way.

Yeah. And what a beautiful coincidence. Of course, there are no coincidences, but your wife was at that very moment reading the book about sugar, Sugar Blues.

Now, nobody in the family, I never stopped anybody from eating it, but they could do it. I mean, Judy could take a piece of chocolate cake, take one bite, wrap it up, save it for the rest of the week and have one bite a night. I couldn’t do that. If we put a piece of chocolate cake, I’d eat the whole thing and ask for seconds.

Yeah, I heard this before: Each of us is wired either as a moderator or as an abstainer. So, I’m an abstainer, meaning I cannot just have a bite. I need to have the whole thing. I need to keep eating. I just can’t stop until it’s gone, and then I look for the next piece of whatever, so I have to cut it out completely. So, I’m an abstainer.

Well, there’s a great expression that explains that. When moderation isn’t an option, abstinence is the only solution. So I’m exactly like you. It’s all or nothing. All right, so what else about speaking?

One other side note. Before we jump into the next speaking topic, I just want to mention here when you were talking about two plus two equals four, am I sure? And so this one quote popped into my mind. It’s from Mark Twain, and I just wanted to shIn modern times, people say, I’ve wanted to do x and finally did it. Or I’ve beeare it and get your take on it. It ain’t what you don’t know that gets you into trouble. It’s what you know for sure that just ain’t so. Do you know that quote?

Yes.

What pops up in your mind when you hear that?

Well, I think that is how you might figure it out. What is true for you is how I feel the most successful people have governed their lives in all areas, whether it’s athletics, politics, business, making lots of money, whatever it is that they’re in. They become extraordinary, which is one of the common qualities I see in these extraordinary people. This is the same answer I would give if you asked me this question, Joel. What makes a great speaker? Ask me that question, Joel.

What makes you a great speaker?

No, what makes a great speaker?

Okay. What makes anybody a great speaker?

Results.

Yeah.

And if we use that same word to what you’re saying, what is true for you as you listen? What is getting you results? If you’re doing some kind of a marketing effort out of the box from what you’ve done before, that’s definitely giving you an idea. What are your results? Is it working? If it works better than anything else you’ve ever done, then that’s a great idea. If it’s not, it’s not a good idea. 

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So, look at your health and body right now. Do you have enormous energy begging to be released so that you don’t get tired during the day? Your mind works faster than it ever did. If that’s not happening, you’re not getting the results you should. So, you need to look at what you are doing that’s preventing you from being the best you can be.

However, if it works for you, don’t change things that work. So, one of my core values is results. That one thing. Are you in a relationship that’s working? What are the results? Are you a good parent? What are your kids like? Are you a good dog trainer? What’s your dog like? Are you a good salesperson? What are your sales like? Are you a good speaker and communicator? What do people do as a result of your words? Do they put them into action, or do they just say, well, that was interesting, and keep doing what they’ve been doing?

So, how do you measure that? It’s easy to get feedback forms after the talk that say, “Wow, this was a great talk. I’m inspired. “But then if they keep doing the same old bad habits after they get home from the event, you haven’t really been a change agent for them.

Well, one of the things we did after any program and why IBM loved having me is that we had a follow-up program, and then we asked them now that 30 days are gone because 30-day goals were one of the big factors talked about in those seminars. What have you done in the last 30 days, constantly getting in those days’ back letters and turning them into emails?

In modern times, people say, I’ve wanted to do x and finally did it. Or I’ve been talking about exercising, and I have done it. Or I started yoga now, and I feel so much more flexible. Thank you for giving me that suggestion. So 30 days was a great concept because if you told somebody never to drink anything but water for the rest of their life, most people would not buy into that. Why don’t you try it for 30 days and see how you feel? If you feel amazing and are results-oriented, keep doing it.

If you’re trying some new marketing idea to build your email list and suddenly getting more emails than you ever had, keep doing what you’re doing. And then how do you tweak it? How do you make it even better? How do you take it up one level? Don’t go in a completely different direction because look at the results you’re getting. Maybe somebody else is getting better results, but you’re getting better results than you used to get, and that’s all that counts.

Yeah. It’s comparative to you and not to others who might have a flatter tummy or more pronounced abs or abdominal muscles or be able to bench press more or whatever. It’s just about your own journey and how you compare yourself over time.

Yes.

Something you said about results reminded me of something I implemented a few years ago on my website. And I think it’s a great little marketing tip. I used to have a page on the site called testimonials, and then I forget where I heard this or how I came about it. Still, I ended up changing that to results, and I made sure that it also included all the case studies and any podcast episodes where I was interviewing the client so that those were success-oriented or case study podcast episodes, as well as case study write-ups as well as testimonial quotes. And that is not just praise; that’s results. I think that it is much more compelling and interesting for a visitor to your website.

Absolutely.

So, what was the gist of the 30-day goal? When everyone wrote their feedback form, many of them said that the 30-day goals aspect of your talk was the best part. What was the gist of that?

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Yes, I consistently came up as certainly one of the top three whenever it was used because everybody is pretty much goal-oriented, especially your listeners. If you’re an entrepreneur or business owner doing sales and marketing, you have goals. Still, most people set big goals, and this came from a personal experience I had in 1967 when I heard Earl Nightingale‘s strangest secret record.

I was a carpenter, banging nails, digging ditches, going nowhere fast. No formal education, didn’t do well in school, had no goals, and was just kind of drifting by making $62.50 a week doing hard labor. A guy in our church asked me if I wanted to sell the World Book encyclopedia door to door on a commission, which sounded like the stupidest thing in the world because I couldn’t talk to people. Do you remember when you were young? As you’re listening, were you who you are today, or were you very different? People change. People find it hard to believe that I was shy and self-conscious and had no confidence. But that’s exactly what it was like because I’d never done anything then.

I was 26 years old, married and going nowhere when I heard The Strangest Secret, which enabled me to get into a sales job. I didn’t do well in the beginning, but I eventually figured it out because of that record. And on Earl Nightingale’s strangest secret record, which you should go to YouTube and watch, it stole the largest-selling recording ever made of a spoken word message. He talked about setting goals. 

So, I set some goals, including five-year, ten-year, and one-year goals. By the end of a year of goal setting, I was so frustrated and discouraged that I went to my boss, who had given me that record. I said, “This goal stuff doesn’t work.” And he said, “Tell me your goals.”

I said, “Well, I got a one-year goal, a five-year goal.” He said, “Joel, you need to hear the winding river story.” So now, as you’re listening, maybe you need to hear the story of the winding river. If you’re not achieving your goals, you’re getting frustrated and discouraged because you’re not getting where you want to go. So here’s what this very wise man said to me. 

Picture yourself in a boat in a river. That’s a winding, snake-like river. Stephan, do you have that picture? You have a little tiller.

You can give some direction to the boat because there are rapids ahead and boulders to watch out for. You can move the boat a little, but you don’t have an engine. But there are steep-walled canyons on both sides of you, and it’s a winding, snake-like river. So, as you’re listening, answer this question. Stephan’s going to do it for you. How far ahead can you see in this boat going down this river?

Just make it to the next bend in the river.

Maybe 100 meters or what are you?

Seeing up in front of you at 100 meters?

Well, it makes a bend, and I can’t see.

It makes a bend. So you can see to that bend. It could be 200 or 300, but you can only see the bend when you make that bend. Now, how far can you see?

Yeah, maybe another 100 or 200 meters.

To the next bend.

Right.

And then Vernon says to me, “Joel, the boat is your current job. The river is your life. And at the end of that river is a beautiful placid lake. And because you’re a young person, you’re going to make it to that beautiful placid lake if you do three things, starting right now, because I’m in an airplane looking down at this winding river and your boat. You and I can see all of the rapids ahead, the boulders to watch out for, but there is that beautiful placid lake, and you’re going to make it there if you do three things. Number one, don’t look back. The past is over. The river is your life. It only goes forward. Rivers don’t go backward. It’s carrying you forward. Learn from the past; don’t live in the past. Number two, focus on your boat. That’s your job. The current activity you’re doing. Whatever you do, never think of the next step in your career.”

Break your big goals into little goals, and you’ll make it to that beautiful placid lake at the end of that river.

“So what do you mean?” He said, “Because if you’re thinking of the next step, you’re not focusing on what you’re doing now. Focus on what you’re doing now and do it amazingly well, and you’ll be lifted out to the next step when you’re amazing at what you do because you’re so focused.” And then he said these magic words, “Just make it to the next bend in the river.” I said, “Well, how far ahead is that now?” You said 100 meters, 200 meters, we don’t know. He said, “When it comes to setting goals, why don’t you just set 30-day goals? You can have a yearly goal, but break it down into 30-day pieces if you want to sell 300 of them. Well, what can you do? Divide that by twelve. That’s what you need to do in 30 days. If you want to lose weight, you want to lose 24 pounds. That’s two pounds every 30 days, and you’ve lost 24 in a year. Break your big goals into little goals, and you’ll make it to that beautiful placid lake at the end of that river.”

Well, Stephan, just retelling that story to you and your listeners. I can just hear this man telling me that in 1967. And that was a change in my life because that’s when I started setting only 30-day, not ten-year, not five-year goals. Things change so fast, but you put a full commitment in. So that’s the story of 30-day goals. Hopefully, that’s helpful as you listen to your goals.

You can have the five-year plan, but we’re going into June in a few days. What are you going to do in June? What are you going to do now? Not in five years. It creates such great urgency and gives you focus, which is so important. So that’s the 30-day goal story.

I love that. I love that. And a funny quote that I remember, kind of related. It’s from Mike Tyson. Everybody has a plan until they get punched in the mouth.

Yes, yes. But you can still handle that when it’s 30 days. You’ve got 30 days to recover, 28 days or 15 days, and then you reset the goal.

Yeah, that’s cool. I can see why many people wrote that down in their feedback forms.

Well, it’s amazing. Just yesterday, we got an email from somebody who heard me 40 years ago, and in there, he said, “Yes, I remember, make it a great day. And the 30-day goals and the winding river and Coyote Power,” which was one of my themes, and that was 40 years ago. 

He just happened to read a post that Jenny posted on Facebook. Stumbled across it. When you have a story that impacts your listeners, you make it about them, not about you. I know the story of the winding river, but as you’re listening now, you know it. Are you focused on your current activity? Are you not looking back? Are you looking ahead? And are you making it to that next bend in your winding river? Because you are in a boat going down a river. And right now, wherever you are in your life, you can only see so far ahead. You can’t see the rest of your life. 

Now, at my age, going to be 83, I’ve had a longer distance. And I know that, like Stephan says, “there are no coincidences, there are no accidents. All things work together for good.” That’s what I’ve learned in my entire life. Everything bad that happened was really good when you put it in perspective. You wouldn’t be where you are now if what had happened to you hadn’t happened. But when you’re going through the tough times, it’s hard to think it’s good. But it is. There’s a blessing in there. 

If that was your mindset, when something bad happens, that’s good. And I have a video that you saw me give at the annual event of Genius Network called The Glad Game. When W. Clement Stone taught me that he was one of the top motivational speakers back in the eighties and a billionaire, and he gave a talk, and he explained that when anything bad happened, the first thing out of his mouth was he’d scream, that’s good. And then, my mind would set about figuring out what’s good about it.

So he told this story. He said, “As a matter of fact, coming to the Palmer house,” and that’s where he was when I heard him tell the story; he said, “My limo was hit head-on and destroyed. The driver was okay. I was okay. And when we got out of the car, we looked at this mess, and the driver told me, my limo driver told me, it’s total.” And I said, “That’s good.” And he said, “Mister Stone, why is that good?” He said, “We’re getting a new limo.” And just then, the guy next to me, it’s a complete stranger, says, “Yeah, because he’s a billionaire. He can get a new limo.” 

And I was just thinking, “You know, he’s right. He’s a rich guy. He can just replace things.” And just as both of us are thinking of that, this tiny little man and he was a tiny guy, must have been five two, with a bow tie and a beautiful suit, said, “Now you’re probably thinking it’s because I’m rich that I can get me a new limousine. Well, I am rich. And then he made this statement. How do you think I got rich?” By saying, “When anything bad happens, that’s good.”

And let my mind figure out how to turn the negative into a positive. How do I make something good out of this accident? How do I make something good out of this business failure? How do I make something good about this lost sale? What if you did what W. Clement Stone did for his entire life? Say, that’s good?

Yep. You know, that reminds me of another famous quote. This one’s from Judaism. Rabbi Nachum Ish Gamzu was famous for. From hundreds and hundreds of years ago. Famous for saying, “This, too, is for the good.”

Well, I agree 100% for that one. Thank you, Rabbi. Yes, this, too, is for the good.

Yeah.

If you have that mindset, it’s all in your thinking. And if you’re an entrepreneur, the wonderful thing is you control your life. It’s your choice to use marketing, sales, speaking, and business growth.

It’s all mindset. And it’s all perspective. And when you see life as a positive conspiracy, it’s a rigged game but in your favor. Earl Nightingale, how he, with his record, changed your life and that. And he ended up becoming a friend of yours, too.

Yes.

What are the odds of all this stuff happening? It’s amazing, no?

In the last three years, he moved to Scottsdale, and I spent a lot of time with him. And his wife is still a very good friend. He passed on in 1989 and was the first guest on my new houseboat in 1987. I have a picture of him and me sitting up on that upper deck. He just had a wonderful experience. And who would have imagined that in ‘76, I would hear him for the first time? And now, in 1987, he was on my boat when I was making no money. $62 a week times 50 weeks, $3,500 a year. It’s amazing. But that’s what you can do when you get the right ideas and have a guide at your side, somebody to help you.

And that’s why you follow Stephan. That’s why you’re on this podcast: to get good ideas. And then it’s up to you to implement them and get results. And if you’re not getting results, stop doing what you’re doing.

You have such good ideas, not just in speaking but in life. And I get to hear those at every Genius Network meeting. You’re, I think, the only other speaker besides Joe, Joe Polish, who runs the group and speaks every meeting, because you’re providing those ten-minute talk presenters with feedback in real-time right after their talk. And you share such amazing wisdom tips for the entire audience to learn from the best practices of even the most early-stage speakers. They did something right, and you picked up on it, and you wrote that down, and then you go and congratulate them for it, unpack it, and explain it to the audience so that they can apply that same technique in their speeches. Really, really cool.

Well, thank you. Glad it’s helpful.

Yeah. So now I know we’re out of time, but I just wanted to, first of all, bring that up as an example of you actively engaging and sharing your wisdom on a regular basis. I think that’s awesome. I also want to encourage our listener who is interested in up-leveling their speaking to work with you. Because you have your ultimate speaking system and you provide training and coaching and assistance for your clients to get them to the next level in their speaking, even if they’re just at the beginning or if they’re already seasoned speakers if they’re even professional speakers making a living off of speaking. You can help all of them.

Find out what everybody else is doing, and don’t do it. Don’t compete, create.

We’ve been very blessed to work with some amazing speakers and watch how they can take it to the highest level. One of them is a well-known speaker with 40 years of experience speaking English. When he changed his personal story and put the audience in the story, he wrote me an email saying I never got that response. I’ve been telling the same story for 40 years but never told it this way. And I got the greatest response I ever felt from an audience because they were in the story. So, hopefully, you’ve picked up some of these things, these little things that make a difference.

Yeah. Awesome. So, what is your website, and how do people take the next step?

Well, it’s very simple, ultimatespeaker.com, and it lists all the different things that we have available. Check it out and see if it’s helpful. And there’s a place to get on my calendar if you’re serious about taking your speaking to a higher level. I work one-on-one with a few people every month because I have a very unique coaching program.

When you hire a coach, you buy time, like so many hours a month, a week or a year. I don’t do any of that because Earl Nightingale, on one of our fishing trips, taught me this great concept, which is wonderful. As you’re listening, think of how ready you are for this truth. Find out what everybody else is doing, and don’t do it. Don’t compete, create. So, in my coaching program, you hire me one time, you pay me one time, we don’t count hours, and you have me forever.

Now, obviously, I’m not 20 years old. You say, well, that sounds great. I hire you, pay all that money, and you die. Next week I’m out, everything. No, you get a one-year unconditional guarantee that you get me at least for a year, for as often as you need, and you never pay another penny. And at the end of the year, we just keep going. So I’ve had some people I’ve been working with for four or five years constantly calling, having a new presentation, needing some help on this, going on a podcast, and doing a new video. How does this sound? Can we make it even better? And that’s what it is.

So that’s all on that website. And then we have an online program that’s very inexpensive that you can use that has all of these tools in it, like how to tell your personal story, how to put the audience in there, how to open with the point. All of these things, plus little tweaks. So I’m going to give you one little new idea. If you heard somebody say to you while listening, “I can help you earn more money,” would that sound good? Or they may say, “I can help you get in better shape,” well, listen to those words. If somebody said to you, “I can help you earn more money,” it really is inferring you’re not doing very well financially right now.” I can help you get in better shape means,” You know, you’re really not in very good shape. But if you add one four-letter word, every time you put it in an email or out of your mouth, use the words more or better.

Every time you say more or better, drop in even. So, let me repeat those statements. I can help you earn even more money. You’re doing well now, but there’s another level. I can help you get an even better shape. I mean, you’re in good shape now, but there’s one more level that would get you there. So there’s a little tweak that you can try right away today in your next email; if you’re writing somebody and saying the words more or better, type in even and look at the difference in the impact that one word makes.

Yep, that’s great. It works in email subject lines, titles, and signature speeches. It works in web page headlines and their title tags. Yeah, it works everywhere. It’s really cool.

Simple idea.

Speak to your audience about what they need in an organized way they can follow and get yourself out of the way.

Yep. I’ve got a little addition to that, too. And I learned this recently from Alen Sultanic. I’m in a private Facebook group that he runs. That’s really cool. And he shared this recently. Just add the words in 2024. Okay, so if your headline was “How to Make Even More Money Doing What You’re Doing in 2024” it’ll pull better and get better results.

And wow, there’s another good thing. It’s all little things, and little things can yield huge results.

Really cool. Awesome. Well, thank you so much.

I have 22 words to leave you with.

Okay, let’s do it.

Can I give him 22 words?

Go for it.

All right. As you’ve been listening and talking about speaking and how you can be an even better communicator and all the things that you heard, opening with the point of not performing, being yourself, getting results, and judging by it, knowing two plus two is four. Not eating crap, all the things that you heard. But if you wanted to know how you can be an even better speaker if I boiled it down to 22 words, here’s what those words would be for you. Speak to your audience about what they need in an organized way they can follow and get yourself out of the way.

Joel, you’re amazing, inspiring and, yeah, a really cool guy. So, thank you for joining us.

Your listeners are amazing. It’s all about them.

Yes, it is. It is. And they’re out there revealing light in the world and making the world a better place as well. Thank you, listener, for being part of this tribe and part of this movement to make the world a better place and to be a light. We’ll catch you in the next episode. In the meantime, have a fantastic week. Make it a fantastic week. I learned that from you, Joel.

Yes, make it a great day.

Because it’s not enough to just have a great day. You got to make it right so you’ve got the creative force to do so. We’ll catch you in the next episode. I’m your host, Stephan Spencer, signing off.

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Your Checklist of Actions to Take

Adopt the mantra “This, too, is for the good” to turn negatives into positives. A positive outlook can significantly influence my entrepreneurial journey.

Set 30-day goals to maintain focus and momentum. Shorter goals help me stay on track and make adjustments quickly.

Always prioritize the needs of my audience. Tailor my message to ensure it resonates and provides value to them.

Start my presentations by clearly communicating the main point. This sets expectations and keeps my audience engaged.

Share personal stories but tie them to my audience’s experience. This builds rapport and makes my message more relatable.

Adopt healthy eating habits for better energy and productivity. Simple changes like cutting out sugars can dramatically improve my performance.

Seek feedback to improve continuously. Use tools like feedback cards to gather insights and make necessary adjustments.

Focus on getting results, not just completing tasks. Evaluate the effectiveness of my efforts regularly to ensure progress.

Embrace opportunities to break old habits. Clear, decisive changes can lead to significant improvements in various areas of life.

To connect with Joel Weldon and enhance my speaking abilities, consider visiting his website, ultimatespeaker.com.

About Joel Weldon

Joel Weldon is a member of the Speakers Hall of Fame. He’s been paid to speak at over 3,000 events around the world and has coached over 10,000 speakers using his Ultimate Speaking System. Some people can do it, and some can teach; Joel can do both. Today, Joel coaches people on how to be even more effective when speaking on stage, in a video, in a podcast or in a client meeting.